For over 30 years, I’ve been teaching the value of practicing “Correction without Invalidation”. I’m a proponent of this practice because I used to beat myself up badly for making mistakes and how life-changing it was when I discovered the value of mistakes rather than feeling guilty for making them.
They say that you never make the same mistake twice. The first time may be a mistake. But the next time, it’s a decision. Well if that’s true, I’ve made a lot of bad decisions in my life. Good chance you have, too.
And it used to be so painful to admit to myself and to others when I messed up. Sometimes it took days and even months to recover from having erred. Even though I was well intentioned, the guilt spirals I went into were debilitating.
Do You Know the Difference?
Living your best life doesn’t just happen. It needs to be by choice rather than by chance.
Your best life requires design and planning. And they are closely associated.
But in my mind, designing is different than planning. Designing is the vision of what you want your life to look like. As the architect of your life, you design it the way you want it to be.
A common mistake people make is delegating or outsourcing—both good things to do—without setting up a system or even a simple reminder to make sure what was done was done the way it was intended.
I recently had our gutters cleaned by a young, ambitious contractor with some top-of-the-line pressure-washing equipment. I explained that it was a bit tricky around our pool and courtyard as the roof tiles extended almost all the way over the gutter.
When he was picking up to go, I grabbed a ladder and looked down the gutter on one side of the pool and saw that it was still chuck full of leaves and pine needles.